Tuesday, April 22, 2014

6 Things Shy People Can Teach Us About Success

Chances are we’ve all experienced a bout of shyness in our lives, whether it’s when we've walked into a party full of strangers or tried to shine in a job interview. And if you identify as a shy person, you’re definitely not the only one -- approximately 40 percent of American adults feel the same way.
And yes, shyness has been associated with negative outcomes -- characteristics like difficulty maintaining eye contact, feelings of humiliation and sometimes even detachment are all known to be part of a shy person's M.O. It's these traits that tend to affect some shy individuals' ability to connect, says C. Barr Taylor, a professor of psychology at Stanford University. “Being shy can keep you from a lot of things in life that are good for you,” he tells The Huffington Post. “Shy people have a general reluctance [to overwhelming social situations], so there is a natural urge to look away from people. For example, when you meet someone you may shake their hand and look away.”
But while shyness can often be seen as a bad thing, there are ways to use the personality trait to your advantage, Taylor says. “We tend to ‘medicalize’ everything,” Taylor explains. “Shyness shouldn’t be seen as a medical problem -- it’s a pattern where you feel uncomfortable, but it’s very common.”
In order to harness the power of shyness -- and start looking at some of its aspects in a positive light -- there are certain behaviors we can all tap into. Below, find six common shy habits and how you can learn to make them benefit you.
They’re thinkers.
Shy people tend to reflect inwardly -- a lot. (And sometimes that mind just won’t shut off.) But according to Taylor, all that thinking may not always be a bad thing. “Shyness shouldn’t be thought of as something you can’t deal with or get over,” he explains. “I think it’s good for people not to see it as an impairment but rather as a way you can think actively as you go into a situation.”
With the progress of technology, the art of deep thinking may have been lost and replaced by quick task-switching. But there are benefits to getting swallowed by thought. For starters, our creative process -- something that is deeply valued in today's workforce -- thrives under a wandering mind. People who are better thinkers also have a greater ability to make more well-thought out decisions.
However, Taylor notes, there's a key difference between deep reflection andoverthinking (and working yourself up) -- particularly when it comes to thoughts on a specific situation. For shy people who feel worried about facing a particular challenge or event, he advises slowly approaching the fearful situation if you start to feel anxious. By facing what you’re feeling insecure about, Taylor says, you’ll feel less apprehensive. “Our brains are amazing -- they can become well adapted,” he says. “If you put yourself in a fearful situation, you’ll get a sense that you’re going to do it. By treating [situations where you’re normally shy] as a trial and then a success, you can overcome it.”
They’re observant.
Shy people often pick up on parts of their conversation or surroundings that others may not -- and then relate it back to the social bonding, Taylor says. “Just because you’re shy doesn’t mean you’re not attuned to social situations,” Taylor says. “It can actually become a source of strength as you are the observer in the room.”
More reserved individuals also have a superior ability to read people’s facial expressions. In a study out of Southern Illinois University at Carbondale, researchers found an association between college-age adults who were shy and the ability to better identify expressions of sadness and fear compared with those who weren't shy. “We tend to give shy people a bad rap,” researcher Laura Graves O'Haver said of the study in LiveScience. “It might be nice to focus on those strengths.”
They’re listeners.
While most people associate being shy with being removed from a conversation, it's not always the case. In fact, shy individuals could end up being the best conversationalists due to the fact that they're so in-tune with what each person in the group is saying. In an in-depth essay on the cost of shyness, psychologists Bernardo Carducci and Philip Zimbardo explain that while shyness can hold someone back, a shy person's innate drive to absorb a conversation can be his or her greatest strength:
If they can get over their self-induced pressures for witty repartee, shy people can be great at conversation because they may actually be paying attention. (The hard part comes when a response is expected.) According to Harvard's Doreen Arcus, shy kids are apt to be especially empathic. Parents of the children she studies tell her that "even in infancy, the shy child seemed to be sensitive, empathic, and a good listener. They seem to make really good friends and their friends are very loyal to them and value them quite a bit." Even among children, friendships need someone who will talk and someone who will listen.
Read more:6 Things Shy People Can Teach Us About Success

7 Simple Truths about Dressing with Less

7 Simple Truths
Even when what we want most is change, we resist it. When we hear about an idea that sounds interesting, but uncomfortable, the most logical reaction is to turn and
walk run away. At least that’s how I operate. And after all of the resistance and walking away, I always wonder what all the fuss was about after I get started.
People often approach minimalist fashion challenge Project 333 with hesitation and resistance, but after getting started, they are thrilled with the benefits of dressing with less.
April 1st is the next official start date of Project 333 challenging you to dress with 33 items for 3 months. You can start on your own or take the course for extra inspiration and instruction. I hope the following simple truths about dressing with less will help remove the resistance.

1. You won’t die if you wear something two days in a row.

You can wear the same pair of jeans several days in a row, or the same sweater/scarf/shirt/insert item here _________. There are exceptions, but the idea is much less horrific than you might imagine.

2. You can buy it when you get there.

Leave your just in case items behind. You don’t need to plan and pack for every scenario. Unless you are going on a trip into the wild, you can borrow or buy what you need.

3. No one cares what you are wearing.

You think way more about what you wear than anyone else. People may comment on what you wear, but usually those comments are an effort to connect with you in some way.

4. What people think of you is really none of your business.

This quote from Martha Graham always reminds me not to bother worrying about what everyone else thinks. Don’t dress to elicit a reaction or because of what you think people might think about you. It shouldn’t influence the decisions you make while getting dressed or doing anything else.
This is your closet, your heart, and your life. No one knows those things better than you.
Read more:7 Simple Truths about Dressing with Less

Monday, April 21, 2014

10 Habits You Should Take Up To Live To 100

10 Habits You Should Take Up To Live To 100
Living to be 100. It’s a lofty goal, but one most of us want. It’s seemingly the magic number for a long, prosperous life. But 100 years on the planet is very different than loving life each of those 100 years. Here are 10 habits your should take up now to live to 100.

1. Workout. Be active.

A body in motion stays in motion. A body at rest stays at rest. Stay in motion. Daily. With the vast majority of jobs moving more to the office and less in the field, it’s easy to spend most of your time sitting. Exercise becomes a vital factor in maintaining a healthy, happy life well into the golden years. Learning to play golf and tennis when you’re young can help you stay active when older and offer a great way to stay social for years to come.

2. Love unconditionally.

As you get older, many of the things that you find most appealing today won’t even be a huge part of your life in the future. Your job will consume less of your life, your good looks will fade, and your relationships with family and friends will endure. Make sure you make time for those who you love at every stage of your life. Love your spouse, your children, your friends, and your family unconditionally. Share love. Maintain the bond and hold on to those close to you. Many of the petty problems that can often drive a wedge into families happen when you are younger and more proud. Love unconditionally and you’ll find a loving, caring support system shines through when other things fade.

3. Embrace the changes that age brings.

You will change. From your body to your mind and everything in between, age will conquer. Embrace it. Wrinkles bring with them wisdom and years of memories and stories. Share them. Don’t let the changes rule you, rather make the most of your experience.

4. Eat your veggies.

Eat well, not just as you get older, but in each stage of life. Food is such a vital part of your life, make sure it’s fuel for your body and not damaging. You can’t live to be 100 if you’re not healthy. A healthy diet is one of the best ways to improve your quality of life and maintain it for a long, long time.

5. Sleep. Nap. Stay rested.

Get enough sleep. A well-rested body performs at its best and offers protection against illness and fatigue. You’ll get less stressed and keep wear and tear off your body. Find a sleep pattern that works for you and stay rested. Sleep is vital for recovery. You’ll test your body each and every day. Give it the time it needs to heal properly and it will reward you will a long, healthy life.
Read more:10 Habits You Should Take Up To Live To 100

8 Feng Shui Tips To Keep You Grounded & Empowered

8 Feng Shui Tips To Keep You Grounded & Empowered
Photo Credit: Shutterstock.com

Empowerment in the modern world has never been more easy or more difficult, depending on how you view it.
We're now all connected in a truly global way, and though we may have a zillion easy ways to communicate and more access than ever before to incredible information…
... so many of us feel disconnected.
Many clients come to me seeking empowerment — a feeling of fulfillment and having a life of purpose - while they struggle to reconcile that desire with their modern life of hyper-speed everything.
In feng shui, when you live a life largely driven by mental processes - texting, typing, reading, watching, thinking - you have an excess of metal energy. In layman’s terms: you get stuck in your head.
It’s so ironic that so much mental labor can lead you to feel totally out of your mind.
This excess of mental “metal energy” manifests in headaches, loneliness, a feeling of being flighty, anxious or disconnected. At its most chaotic, this metal overload can leave us feeling out of control, flighty, weak, trapped or just generally numb.
Not desirable at all!
We experience life through our senses. People stuck in their head are not present enough to experience most of the sensory world around them.
If you're a "space cadet," you likely need to get grounded. You need more Earth in your life.
Being grounded means being peaceful, connected to the flow of the your life. Grounded people are vibrant, present, engaging, warm and confident.
Simply put: being grounded feels incredible.
Here are some feng shui ways to help you get there!
1. Watch for too much electricity.
If you live close to lots of power lines outside, put lots of plants in your house to absorb the excess electrical energy. Don’t overload outlets with plugs. Properly plug in all appliances. I recently learned that my stove was plugged illegally into an extension cord. I never felt comfortable there. Now that it's grounded, it's my favorite space to be.
2. Try some silence.
Turn your phone off. Close the computer for a siesta. Take some down time or a full day off if you can. Be quiet.
3. Eat more root veggies: beets, carrots, parsnips.
This is a simple way to literally consume more of the Earth’s energy.
4. Visit a forest or some big, local trees.
Lush trees with deep roots are the ultimate in grounded energy. Sit with them. Lean against them. Plant trees where they can be planted. If you are a city dweller living far from the woods, indoor trees in giant pots are incredible, too.
Read more: 8 Feng Shui Tips To Keep You Grounded & Empowered

Sunday, April 20, 2014



Study, work hard, and you will be successful.
This was the mantra repeated by educators throughout my youth. None of them added "be happy" to the success equation.
But a growing body of research in positive psychology and neuroscience is demonstrating that happiness is the secret ingredient to success. It turns out, our brains are more engaged, creative, productive, and resilient when in a positive state.
Jim Donovan, consultant, speaker and proclaimed "happiness expert" offers workplace advice to employers and employees on how to make their work lives more fulfilling. His latest book Happy @ Work comes on the heels of a Gallup poll that reported employee disengagement in the U.S. as high as 70%.
All this unhappiness comes with a high price tag to businesses, costing more than $550 billion a year in lost productivity. In his book, Donovan identifies 60 simple steps individuals can take to improve their happiness and get back on the path to success. Here are six of the top things happy workers do:


“Problems tend to be things we try to avoid, while challenges are things we step up to fix,” writes Donovan. Making this minor change in vocabulary can have a big impact on how you deal with a situation. A challenge can be interpreted as an opportunity to showcase your talents or learn a new skill.


Many of us get stuck in the daily rut; driving the same route to work, eating the same breakfast, starting the day by filtering through emails. Changing up our routine stimulates the brain, enhancing creativity and happiness. “By changing your everyday patterns and habitual processes, you will be creating new neural connections in your brain.
Simply changing your route to and from work will expose you to new visual and auditory stimuli, [for example],” writes Donovan. This explains why extraordinary thinkers such as Steve Jobs and Steven Spielberg were known to on long walks to stimulate breakthrough ideas.

Are You Living Life At 10 Out Of 10? Probably Not, But Here's How You Can...

Are You Living Life At 10 Out Of 10? Probably Not, But Here's How You Can...
We asked award-winning leadership development expert Anne Mulliner for her tips on how we can start living life at 10 out of 10.
Do you ever feel like you're sleepwalking through life? Before you know it, months and months have passed and you've achieved nothing you set out to. If this sounds familiar then don’t worry, you're not alone. Here are 8 ways you can start living your life at 10 out of 10.

1. Be honest with yourself. Unintentionally we can find ourselves living lives that someone else wants for us, we go through the motions out of habit or a belief that it is what we should want (you're not the only one who slaved away at university for a career path they weren't too sure about in the first place or got a mortgage when they really weren't ready), but you need to be honest about what you really want. Then you can start to take action to close the gap.
2. It's okay to not be okay. Life will throw us curve balls at times and that's okay and completely normal. In fact, having the odd low point means we are better able to notice and appreciate the high points. By accepting this as fact, you will notice that you will bounce back from any setbacks faster.
3. Failing isn’t an option. One of the things that make people most unhappy is having experiences that don’t work out the way they think they would and so they label it as a failure. But don't think of it as a failure, think of it as research. That's right. If something didn’t work out as planned, change something and try again. So list out all the things that you believe are failures in your life for one last time and when you look at the list tell yourself it was all research and you are free to try again, but do something different until you find the right combination for you.
4. Maximize your personal brand. It is really easy when you are feeling a bit down to take less care of your personal image, but if you want to show up at 10 out of 10 – even if you are only at an 8 – you need to dress like someone who is 10 out of 10.

Read more at http://www.marieclaire.co.uk/blogs/546189/are-you-living-life-at-10-out-of-10-probably-not-but-here-s-how-you-can.html#KH5SwTSqM2TLIKep.99

Saturday, April 19, 2014

25 Inspirational Quotes From Great Personal Development Authors

Personal Development quotes from Self help authors books
There are a number of amazing personal development books out there, and among the 100′s of classics there are some great gems of wisdom. So we have researched some of the top personal development books and extractedthe top personal development quotes that we found to be the most inspirational.
We hope you enjoy these amazing personal development quotes. Make sure you share them with your friends and family to spread a little inspiration into their lives also.

25 Inspirational Personal Development Quotes


“When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.” - Viktor E Frankl – Man’s Search for Meaning


“Life is never incomplete if it is an honorable one. At whatever point you leave life, if you leave it in the right way, it is whole.” – Seneca – Stoic Philosophy of Seneca


“The primary cause of unhappiness is never the situation but your thoughts about it.” - Eckhart Tolle - A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose


“A man’s true delight is to do the things he was made for.” – Marcus Aurelius – Meditations


“Knowing others is intelligence; knowing yourself is true wisdom. Mastering others is strength; mastering yourself is true power.” – Lao Tzu - Tao Te Ching


“The top players in every field think differently when all the marbles are on the line. Great performers focus on what they are doing, and nothing else…They let it happen, let it go. They couldn’t care less about the results.” - John Eliot – Overachievement: The New Science of Working Less to Accomplish More


“There is one single thread binding my way together…the way of the Master consists in doing one’s best…that is all.” – Confucius – The Analects of Confucius


“What we fear doing most is usually what we most need to do.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson - Selected Writings of Ralph Waldo Emerson


“What holds most people back isn’t the quality of their ideas, but their lack of faith in themselves. You have to live your life as if you are already where you want to be.” – Russell Simmons – Do You!


“The word courage comes from the same stem as the French word Coeur, meaning “heart.” Thus just as one’s heart, by pumping blood to one’s arms, legs, and brain enables all the other physical organs to function, so courage makes possible all the psychological virtues. Without courage other values wither away into mere facsimiles of virtue.” – Rollo May – The Courage to Create


“But until a person can say deeply and honestly, “I am what I am today because of the choices I made yesterday,” that person cannot say, “I choose otherwise.” - Stephen R. Covey - The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change


“You have to begin to tell the story of your life as you now want it to be and discontinue the tales of how it has been or of how it is.” - Esther & Jerry Hicks – Money, and the Law of Attraction: Learning to Attract Wealth, Health, and Happiness


“Don’t Take Anything Personally. Nothings others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.” – Don Miguel Ruiz – The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom


“In a very real sense we have two minds, one that thinks and one that feels”  - Daniel Goleman - Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ


“We cannot choose our external circumstances, but we can always choose how we respond to them.” - Epictetus - Enchiridion
Read more:25 Inspirational Quotes From Great Personal Development Authors
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